Discussion Board
Welcome Guest! You can login or register. Login or Register.

Options
Go to last post Go to first unread
Trippster  
#1 Posted : Friday, November 14, 2008 6:46:01 PM(UTC)
Found on Deadspin. Bad language but funny as ever!



0-16 Is Upon Us. Jamboroo, Week 11, Featuring King Diamond, Poop, And Mongolian Wok
By Drew Magary, 2:20 PM on Thu Nov 13 2008, 15,623 views


Drew Magarys Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs, well, every Thursday afternoon during the NFL season. Drews new book, Men With Balls, featuring 100% new material, is available RIGHT FUCKING NOW in stores and online here. You can email Drew here. Read him during the week at KSK.

The Detroit Lions are going to go 0-16 this year. Its gonna happen. No joke. Look at their remaining schedule: at Carolina, vs. Tampa, vs. Tennnessee, vs. Minnesota, at Indy, vs. New Orleans, and at Green Bay. With the exception of the Vikings (who can shit the bed against anyone) and maybe the Saints, that is a fucking brutal stretch for any team, much less one that is utterly dead inside. The Lions are fucked. And that is awesome.

We were so close to getting an 0-16 team last year. Those little Miami cockteases were just the kind of rudderless, shitty team that seemed up to the task. But nooooo, they had to go and win in overtime against the Ravens and ruin the fun for everyone. What a bunch of selfish pricks. You should have seen them celebrate after they won. Oooh! Look at us! We won one whole game! HOORAY FOR SELF ESTEEM! GIVE US A RIBBON! Losers. They must have taken douche-acting lessons from Mercury Morris.

Not this Detroit team. No, I have a complete absence of faith in this teams vomitous play. I really dont believe in them. Not only are they missing talent. And good coaching. And motivation. And a quarterback. But they also have that rare total lack of chemistry that you only see once in a generation. Its rare that you get to see a group of players come apart and play as none, like this team does.

I think Detroit fans deserve an 0-16 team, and I dont mean that as an insult. I mean, what more fitting way to cap the end of Matt Millens reign of fucktardedness than by going 0-16? What more proper legacy of shittiness can that idiot have bestowed upon that town? Look, if youre a Lion fan, and you had to sit through season after season of breathtaking incompetence, you should at least get a little memento for your trouble. You deserve, after years of watching teams that were merely shitty, to have the absolute SHITTIEST team of all time. You deserve that little piece of history. You deserve a chance to have an 0-16 NEVER FORGET tattoo emblazoned on your shoulder blade.

That way, you can hold it over the head of every other fan out there. Oh, you Cubs fans have had it rough, eh? WELL FUCK YOU IN THE PANTS. 0 and 16, you cunts. No one will ever again question your ability to tolerate ill-timed penalties, crucial drops, revolving door QBs, and mindless special teams gaffes. Its almost the same as bragging about having been in prison. And, if youre from Detroit, youre likely to have that on your resume as well.

You deserve a chance to tell your grandson about this team, to sit little Johnny on your lap and say, Oh, upset that I didnt get you a flying hoverboard for Christmas, are you? Well, you can get fucked, little Johnny. Because my team went 0-16 once. And I have arthritis now, so I cant go hoverboarding. I hope you get that new RoboAIDS, kid.

Most importantly, I want to make sure that Millen spends the rest of his life with that 0-16 scarlet letter tattooed on his big fat stupid head. I want him to go to his goddamn grave with people reminding him every five seconds that he was the arrogant, vacuum-headed tardbacker who assembled the absolute worst football team in the history of mankind. I want him to be permanently tarred by his glaring failure, unable to escape from its ever-looming shadow. Perhaps it could drive him to madness, as he spends his final days in the basement of a mental ward, writing out his name on the floor with his own feces.

I think Detroit fans deserve to have that happen. So get ready, everyone. History is about to be made.

The Games
Packers_Finland  
#2 Posted : Friday, November 14, 2008 7:52:43 PM(UTC)
Funny.
Cheesey  
#3 Posted : Saturday, November 15, 2008 10:18:40 AM(UTC)
"as he spends his final days in the basement of a mental ward, writing out his name on the floor with his own feces"


He'd probably spell his name wrong!!!LOLOL!!!
alharrisdude31  
#4 Posted : Wednesday, November 19, 2008 11:24:53 PM(UTC)
with the coaching staff they have?they may as well go 0-pi times 99999999(whatever that is)
Formo  
#5 Posted : Thursday, November 20, 2008 12:38:20 AM(UTC)
" said: Go to Quoted Post
with the coaching staff they have?they may as well go 0-pi times 99999999(whatever that is)


Alot.
dfosterf  
#6 Posted : Thursday, November 20, 2008 1:19:36 AM(UTC)
I feel bad for Detroit. I got an idea. Let's give the team owner and his buddies 50 billion dollars. I'm sure that if they can build a car half as good as they build a team...well, that money will certainly be well-spent.


:thumbleft:
alharrisdude31  
#7 Posted : Thursday, November 20, 2008 5:14:55 PM(UTC)
" said: Go to Quoted Post
I feel bad for Detroit. I got an idea. Let's give the team owner and his buddies 50 billion dollars. I'm sure that if they can build a car half as good as they build a team...well, that money will certainly be well-spent.


:thumbleft:
they would waist all the money on Dante culpepper
Rss Feed
Users browsing this topic
Guest
Forum Jump
You cannot post new topics in this forum.
You cannot reply to topics in this forum.
You cannot delete your posts in this forum.
You cannot edit your posts in this forum.
You cannot create polls in this forum.
You cannot vote in polls in this forum.

Notification

Icon
Error

Fan Shout
buckeyepackfan (26-May) : Cavs!!!!!
Cheesey (26-May) : POLAR BEARS!!!!???lol!
Zero2Cool (26-May) : PENGUINS!!!!
Zero2Cool (24-May) : Sad about Cortez Kennedy. I remember playing him in Tecmo (beast!)
Cheesey (23-May) : RIP Cortez Kennedy
Smokey (23-May) : R.I.P.Sir Rodger (007) Moore .
Smokey (23-May) : Try Fish
Porforis (22-May) : Chicken 4 dayz!
gbguy20 (22-May) : Agreed
Smokey (21-May) : Yes, I like Chick-fil-a .
Smokey (21-May) : Rabid Chicken ? LOL
rabidgopher04 (21-May) : Chick fil a
Zero2Cool (20-May) : Penguins & Bad Guys Tied 2 apiece! LETS GO PENS!
Smokey (20-May) : Who sells the best Chicken Sandwich ? Wendy, the King, McD, etc. ?
Smokey (20-May) : Just Visiting ? Join and post today !
Zero2Cool (18-May) : Screw you. (signed Pens fan)
TheKanataThrilla (18-May) : Go Sens!!! Will be in the crowd for the Friday game.
Smokey (18-May) : E.Lacy makes weight in Seattle by 2 lbs. (253 lbs.)
buckeyepackfan (17-May) : Blount signs 1 year deal with Eagles.
DarkaneRules (14-May) : and still! Miocic & Jedrzejczyk
Zero2Cool (13-May) : RP ... you mean Go Pens ... I fix for you.
RaiderPride (13-May) : Gotta Love P.K. T.K.T. I agree.. Go Preds.
Smokey (12-May) : CB Kevin King signs 4 yr deal, no 5th year option .
TheKanataThrilla (12-May) : Go Nashville in the West
TheKanataThrilla (12-May) : My son is wearing his Mario Lemieux Pens shirt and my daughter is wearing he Sens shirt. We win no matter what.
Zero2Cool (11-May) : Aaron Nagler:Packers announce first training camp practice to be held Thursday, July 27
Zero2Cool (11-May) : Capitals are dirty weak trash.
Zero2Cool (11-May) : NHL is great! PENGUINS!!!!
yooperfan (10-May) : Screw the NBA and the NHL, neither are worth watching!
wpr (10-May) : hahaha. Poor Bettman. Worth the price to see it.
TheKanataThrilla (10-May) : Bettman would blow a gasket if it was an all-Canadian finals. I want Nashville as I am a huge Mike Fisher fan.
Smokey (10-May) : Cheap Shot ? I think not .
wpr (10-May) : Thrilla how about an all Canada Finals?
TheKanataThrilla (10-May) : Pens tomorrow. Screw you Caps for the cheap shot on Crosby.
TheKanataThrilla (10-May) : Go Sens. Want to see the Sens pull it out tomorrow.
Please sign in to use Fan Shout
2017 Packers Schedule
Sunday, Sep 10 @ 3:25 PM
SEAHAWKS
Sunday, Sep 17 @ 7:30 PM
at Falcons
Sunday, Sep 24 @ 3:25 PM
BENGALS
Thursday, Sep 28 @ 7:25 PM
BEARS
Sunday, Oct 8 @ 3:25 PM
at Cowboys
Sunday, Oct 15 @ 12:00 PM
at Vikings
Sunday, Oct 22 @ 12:00 PM
SAINTS
Sunday, Oct 29 @ 12:00 AM
- BYE -
Monday, Nov 6 @ 7:30 PM
LIONS
Sunday, Nov 12 @ 12:00 PM
at Bears
Sunday, Nov 19 @ 12:00 PM
RAVENS
Sunday, Nov 26 @ 7:30 PM
at Steelers
Sunday, Dec 3 @ 12:00 PM
BUCCANEERS
Sunday, Dec 10 @ 12:00 PM
at Browns
Saturday, Dec 23 @ 7:30 PM
VIKINGS
Sunday, Dec 31 @ 12:00 PM
at Lions
Saturday, Dec 17 @ 12:00 PM
at Panthers
Think About It
Think About It
Recent Topics
14h / Green Bay Packers Talk / Porforis

15h / Green Bay Packers Talk / beast

21h / Green Bay Packers Talk / DakotaT

26-May / Green Bay Packers Talk / beast

25-May / Fantasy Sports Talk / Smokey

25-May / Around The NFL / Cheesey

25-May / Green Bay Packers Talk / wpr

23-May / Green Bay Packers Talk / Smokey

22-May / Green Bay Packers Talk / nerdmann

22-May / Green Bay Packers Talk / Smokey

21-May / Packers Draft Threads / Smokey

20-May / Green Bay Packers Talk / Smokey

19-May / Green Bay Packers Talk / sschind

19-May / Green Bay Packers Talk / sschind

18-May / Green Bay Packers Talk / Smokey

Headlines