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so my twins are in 4th grade & were just invited to their first boy/girl party!!!! GAH!!!! i'm totally not ready for this. NO NO NO!!!
oh & cole just told me he doesn't believe in santa claus so yet another kick to the gut. then he said 'oh that means there's no easter bunny, tooth fairy, or leprechaun's either'.
good gawd - make them stop this growing up business k, thanks. :( :(
oh & when do i start the whole birds & bees conversation?? OMG!!!!! |
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sorry dear.
As for THE conversation. When you think they are mature enough. Start small and get into more detail later.
edit- you're a great mother you will do fine. |
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Julie, just keep those horny little bastards away from my blondes. :) |
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One does not simply walk into Mordor. |
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What is a boy/girl party and how would it fundamentally change how 4th graders normally interact? Is this a birthday party where both sexes were invited? |
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it's a halloween party with 4 boys & 4 girls invited.
and thanks for the advice, wayne. i'm hangin in here - just so not ready for the changes that are coming.
kids mature so young these days - mine are wearing deoderant already for cripes sake!!
oh & dakota - be glad you're not around here - they'd be on your blondes in a hot minute! ;) |
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Originally Posted by: 4PackGirl  it's a halloween party with 4 boys & 4 girls invited.
and thanks for the advice, wayne. i'm hangin in here - just so not ready for the changes that are coming.
kids mature so young these days - mine are wearing deoderant already for cripes sake!!
oh & dakota - be glad you're not around here - they'd be on your blondes in a hot minute! ;) keep in mind it is normal for the momma not to want her babies to grow up too fast. When we had our son who we thought would be our last my wife informed me that she wanted to keep him as her baby for as long as she could. I asked he if she loved him. She said of course. I mentioned someone we knew who was an immature selfish spoiled self centered adult. I asked her if she wanted him to grow up to be like this other guy. She said no. I told her that she had to let him grow up in normal fashion. Don't baby him. You have it a lot rougher in that the boys father is a turd. I hope your husband is a good role model for them. I suspect he is. Let him sit in on the "Special Discussion" when you get to it. There are things that mothers mentally know but men have actually lived it. Plus it shows he cares about the boys and their well being. |
One does not simply walk into Mordor. |
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Originally Posted by: 4PackGirl it's a halloween party with 4 boys & 4 girls invited.
and thanks for the advice, wayne. i'm hangin in here - just so not ready for the changes that are coming.
kids mature so young these days - mine are wearing deoderant already for cripes sake!!
oh & dakota - be glad you're not around here - they'd be on your blondes in a hot minute! ;) Dakota may be saying that to protect his daughters. But in reality, you'd want to keep them away from his daughters to protect your sons. Could you imagine having Dakota for a father-in-law?  |
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And here.. I have a countdown clock rolling for each of mine until their departure date. In the Words of Bart Scott.. "Can't Wait".  Seriously though.. I understand your feeling on the topic, it is amazing how fast the time rolls. |
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Develop and maintain an environment of trust between your boys and yourself. I'm sure you already have it, but make sure to keep it. Always keep a line of communication open with them. Make it so they WANT to talk to you about everything. I think back to my childhood and am eternally grateful for my mom. Because she came into my life when I was 6 years old and was in my eyes, 'taking away my dad', she had to work up my trust. By the time I was a senior in HS, I told her everything.
For instance, when I finally disbelieved in Santa, I tried to rub that knowledge into my younger siblings' faces. She took me to the back room and told me that if I wanted to help with the 'Santa duties' that I need to keep quiet about it to my sisters. Funny how that worked. And my 'Santa duties'? Writing the tags out. Since I'm an artist, I was able to make it pretty cool looking.. ANND it wasn't obviously my mom's handwriting.. lol
Anyway, I can understand where you are coming from, Jules. I had the best mom in the world because she did those things with me. Hopefully it helps you some. |
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Don't worry they are not expected to bring booze until they are at least in grade 6.  |
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Times have changed. Back in the day, I remember my parents worrying about whether it was still okay to invite girls to a boy's party. Fortunately, in my case, they only had to worry about it once. (This was also about the time when it stopped being cool having birthday parties.) Either that or they recognized my anti-social (sociopathic?) tendencies early. I think it was something like 6th grade. (The world would be so great if other people stopped getting in the way.) |
None of the above. It wouldn't have been a wasted vote. Obama and Romney -- Those were the wasted votes. |
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Geez people. What's with you all and Santa?  |
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Originally Posted by: zombieslayer Geez people. What's with you all and Santa? I prefer bare-faced brunettes, redheads, and blondes over geezers with beards. /no Santa. |
None of the above. It wouldn't have been a wasted vote. Obama and Romney -- Those were the wasted votes. |
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and again, you guys have come through with great words, advice, & funny stuff for me. thank you!!
yes, thankfully my husband is pretty darn good with the boys. he's given them a great role model that had been sorely lacking. he's a self-made man who never got a thing from his parents his entire life & still doesn't. he's shown them what hard work can do, how being honest can sometimes hurt but it's always best in the end, & that women are to be treasured NOT treated badly. those are HUGE pieces of the parenting puzzle that their 'father' is literally unable to give them. he's really stepped up when i've needed him to & stands to the side when i don't.
the boys & i are very close. i am very careful to not promise them things i cannot deliver because i know how important trust is. i've failed a few times but always try to do my best. i don't hide much from them because i refuse to allow them to be immature, selfish, whiny little brats - so they're not. i'm not perfect though & at times find myself being harder on them than necessary - again a time when i've failed.
all i can say is raising kids is NOT easy. |
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